Sunday, May 28, 2006

Corporate life blows, and I don't care who knows

Now obviously, this is not mummified writing this post. She would never use such vulgar language. Nor would she ever have a negative thought about a rude senior manager in the organisation she works for.

So this is clearly being written by someone else entirely. Possibly an evil twin, or a burglar who has broken into mummified's house with the sole intent of ignoring the stereo and posting on this blog. Someone anyway who is not mummified.


not mummified

I'm back jack


Well, I have been lying low for a little while and many thanks to my lovely fellow bloggers who enquired after my health. I wrote a silly piece of fluff a couple of posts ago (not fuff, fuff is a woman of substance) about the Da Vinci code and someone I hadn't had a comment from before wrote a rather nasty one. The words "paranoid" and various other unkindnesses were used. I get all comments emailed to me direct so when I opened my outlook for my email, I felt as though I had been belted rather hard across the chops (chops=jaw=where your choppers/teeth are). Fortunately, he had subsequently decided to remove it so it wasn't on my actual blog when I went back in.

Now I am the first to admit I am over-sensitive. But I was rather taken aback. When I had finished being taken aback, I felt rather icky. You see, I have had such a good run from you lot, you have been so kind and encouraging that I have become spoilt. And I guess because I do write so directly from my life, I didn't know what to do when I was initiated into the world of mean comments. So, like a wimp, I hid for a while and licked my wounds.

However, they are now healed so I hope to be writing more, reading your blogs and making useful/silly/fun comments.

mummified was mortified (but isn't now)

Thursday, May 18, 2006

bird song

(sung in a sweet voice)
"ah ooo, ah ooo, la la la la, oooooooaaaaaaahhhh, "giggle", "giggle", la la la la la, woooooooooo"

Yes nature lovers, it is the love call of the rare spotted little fella. Nestled in his native habitat - his cot, he sings to his mummy trying to break her spirit after bed time so she will come to him to give him yet another cuddle (3 million and 59) and some more stories.

Many mummies (mommies) have buckled under the pressure of such seductive lyricism. Even the strongest have crumbled. Not I, I have sat down at the computer to blog instead.

What a hard-hearted mummified......

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Da Vinci - Da Sminchy

Having neither read the book nor seen the film, I feel more than qualified to spout off, at length about the Da Vinci Code and its real meaning. Cobbling together glimpses of TV news programs, a hald read article in "The Spectator" and a piccie and caption or too from the local broadsheet "The Age", I have come to the following conclusions:

a) it is just a huge money making exercise (well duh ! I hear you say)
b) the more Hollywood and its media acoloytes trash Christianity, the better chance they have of people seeking meaning in their lives in other ways (like shopping - aka retail therapy - I own, therefore I am)
c) No one would dream of abusing Islam in the way we constantly do Christianity - maybe Muslims are better at getting stroppy when it does happen.
d) no, I am not advocating censorship just sick of Christianity being the whipping boy ALL THE TIME
d) I am only adding fuel to the fire and creating more hype for Dan Brown.

Darn it

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Hot date - way hey hey

Oh ho ho, I hear you thinking. Finally, a bit of smutty stuff from mummified. A bit of rumpy pumpy, snogging, other assorted sexy stuff.

As if. Like I'm going to tell you lot anything about that.

It was a good date though. We drove to the Yarra Valley, a winery area about one hour from Melbourne and headed to the local produce store where they do the best, and I mean the best, goat's cheese. A glass of marsanne, some smoked trout and cheese, local sourdough bread and a fantastic view over verdant pastures and undulating hills. Very mellow.

It is Autumn here (yes, our down-under seasons are upside down, as you would expect) and the gold and russet vines are the most beautiful sight. I love Autumn - crisp air and bright blue skies.

Monday, May 08, 2006

For what we are about to receive....

may the lord make us truly grateful. This was what we used to say at the table before eating lunch (dinner) when I was at school as a kid.

This morning I woke to the news that the 2 miners who have been trapped underground (after an earth tremor caused a cave-in) in Tasmania for 14 days have been freed. Apparently this story has run in Europe and the US some some of you may know what I am talking about.

Anyway, in Australia we held our collective breaths hoping that they would be able to get the guys out by careful drilling and using the latest technology. The miners emerged unscathed early this morning our time. You don't get a lot of good news in the media. This was a welcome exception. And we are really, really grateful.


The 12 step program for home-a-holics

Hi, my name is mummified and I am a home-a-holic.
It started so innocently. I'd read the homewares section in my local paper and scan the real estate section admiring all those flash houses with expensive renovations. But that is the thing. Like other home-a-holics, I was unable to contain my addiction and things soon got worse, much worse.
I'd wake up on the couch after a particularly nasty binge and find home magazines strewn all over the floor. "Home beautiful", "Belle", "Grand designs", "Inside Out" etc etc. I felt great shame yet I couldn't seem to stop. If I was in a newsagency (and this seemed to happen regularly), I would been drawn like a moth to a flame to the home improvement section. The next thing I knew, I would be looking at orange sofas, groovy kitchens and glamorous bathrooms.
I accept that I need help. I have looked for the equivalent of nicotine patches for home-a-holics but no one stocks them. I have tried going cold turkey but then I end up looking at real estate on the internet. This is a cry for help - how can I stop this shocking obsession from taking over my life ?

Sunday, May 07, 2006

My son, the vampire...

Look, I thought Keanu Reeves was cute in that lame Dracula movie with Winona "light fingers" Ryder and Gary what's his name a while back too.
And I have always been a sucker (sorry) for a good vampire flick but the utter agony of having my son's eye teeth (aka pointy little fangs at the top) puncture his gums to come through properly.... well, it was like the night of the undead. Well, if not actually the undead then certainly the "wish I had been dead" - dead to the world and asleep. But no, Mr wailing banshee - aka little fella - was not having any of that nonsense. No way babeee. He was screaming so loudly over a four hour period that I thought the cops were going to break down the door at any minute assuming he was being murdered.
By that point I was in a major panic. Forget the urbane, wise-cracking mummy of yore, I had broken into a sweat thinking he had yet another middle ear infection (stick the pointy end of an old fashioned mathematical compass into your ear and jab as hard as possible to simulate the effect). So a call to the locum who turned up at 2am and pronounced him as having a nasty head cold and possibly teeth coming through. You know, normally I would be embarrassed at having made a fuss and called a doctor out when it didn't turn out to be an actual medical emergency but at that point, I was so wrung out that I just paid the exorbitant fee on my Visa without a peep. I explained that we were going to be flying on a plane the next morning just to check this would be OK.
Nope - not OK. So a trip planned about 5 months ago to visit the rellies (aka relatives) in Western Australia was up in smoke. Not to worry - the nice people at frequent flyer points for Qantas are letting us keep the tickets to use another time. (They were very nice about the 2:30am phone call to cancel).
mummified - quite zombified

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Pink is the new black

Ok - let me explain. Pink is the new black. No, this is not a fashion statement.
Mummified has been watching the zeitgeist - tricky little sucker that it is - and has decided that it is time for a change. Inside rather than outside. For too long we have been surrounded by traditional media banging on to women about what to wear, how to wear it, why you are a hopeless loser if you don't etc etc...
ENOUGH already. Black is not the new black, brown is not the new black and navy can just go get a life. Trying to be good is the new black. Trying to lead a decent life and be respectful of other people is the new black. Not vilifying folk because they are different, wear a headscarf, have a different view, is the new black.
I am sick to death of hearing "hate" bandied about - in the papers, on the radio, on TV. As an omnipotent mummified (remember, I got crowned in my last post), I decree that we should all be more tolerant of others and try to find what we have in common rather than judging each other so harshly. Here endeth the lesson.